November 26, 2008
Actual Work Conversation
Andru: *cough*
Tom (boss): "No Coughing"
Andru: "...um...ok"
*****5 minutes later*****
Tom (boss): *clears throat*
Andru: "No throat clearing"
Tom (boss): "shut up"
Andru: "Don't make me write you up Tom."
Tom (boss): ".....sorry, won't happen again."
Andru: "Let's hope not."
This has been an Actual Work Conversation
Tom (boss): "No Coughing"
Andru: "...um...ok"
*****5 minutes later*****
Tom (boss): *clears throat*
Andru: "No throat clearing"
Tom (boss): "shut up"
Andru: "Don't make me write you up Tom."
Tom (boss): ".....sorry, won't happen again."
Andru: "Let's hope not."
This has been an Actual Work Conversation
SECRETS REVEALED!!!
Thanks to Betty Bowers, homosexuals' sneaky little secrets are now revealed to the godly:
THE HOMOSEXUAL AGENDA!
As every Christian knows, there is only one enemy that threatens our entire civilization. And I am, of course, not talking about Satan. I'm talking about those damned homosexuals! Yes, they give otherwise dull hair radiant highlights and our imperfect décor those fabulous flourishes that elude our more predictable heterosexual sensibilities, but at what price? In exchange for a little panache, we allow homosexuals to steal our children and destroy our Christian marriages. And how do they do this? With their secret masterplan -- The Homosexual Agenda!
Many a well-intentioned person has asked me, "Betty, what exactly is The Homosexual Agenda?" Well, if you have to ask, you are probably already under its pernicious influence and blithely hop-scotching your way straight to Hell. Nevertheless, the details of The Homosexual Agenda have -- up until this day -- been kept more secret than the nature of John Travolta's and Tom Cruise's marriages. But I am pleased to announce that through innumerable free vodka sea-breezes and some artful Christian skullduggery, I have gotten my hands on an authentic copy of The Homosexual Agenda. Praise the Lord!
I have had my secretaries, Miss Anne Thrope and Anita Priceczech, transcribe The Homosexual Agenda from the back of a used cocktail napkin (the original is to be placed in the Smithsonian Institute) for your convenient reference. Never again shall we be surprised by what these malevolent Nancy Boys are up to. While they may still be able to surprise us with a cunningly perfect piece of Chinese porcelain for our Biederimeier end-table, they will never again be able to surreptitiously take over our culture, families and prime-time television without God-fearing Christians being one step ahead of them! Praise the Lord!
The Homosexual Agenda
8:00 a.m. Wake up. Wonder where you are.
8:01 a.m. Realize you are lying on 100 percent cotton sheets of at least a 300 count, so don't panic; you're not slumming.
8:02 a.m. Realize you are actually in your own bed for a change. Wake stranger next to you and tell them you are late for work so won't be able to cook breakfast for them. Mutter "sorry" as you help him look for his far-flung underwear. You find out that you tore his boxers while ripping them off him last night, so you "loan" him a pair of boxer-briefs, but not the new ones because you never intend to see him again.
8:05 a.m. Tell the stranger, whose name eludes you, "It was fun. I'll give you a call," as you usher him out the door, avoiding his egregious morning-breath.
8:06 a.m. Crumple and dispose of the piece of paper with his telephone number on it when you get to the kitchen.
8:07 a.m. Make a high protein breakfast while watching the Today show. Wonder if the stories you've heard about Matt Lauer are true. Decide they must be.
8:30 a.m. Italian or domestic? Decide to go with three-button Italian and the only shirt that is clean.
8:45 a.m. Climb into red Z4 and try not to look too much like Barbie driving one of her accessories as you pull out of your underground parking. Revos or Armanis? Go with Revos.
9:35 a.m. Stroll into office.
9:36 a.m. Close door to office and call best friend and laugh about the guy who spent the night at your condo. Point out something annoying about best friend's boyfriend but quickly add "It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks, just as long as you love him."
10:15 a.m. Leave office, telling your secretary you are "meeting with a client." Pretend not to notice her insubordinate roll of her eyes (or the cloying "poem" she has tacked to her cubicle wall).
10:30 a.m. Hair appointment for lowlights and cut. Purchase of Aveda anti-humectant pomade.
11:30 a.m. Run into personal trainer at gym. Pester him about getting you Human Growth Hormone. Spend 30 minutes talking to friends on your cell phone while using Hammer Strength machines, preparing a mental-matrix of which circuit parties everyone is going to and which are now passe.
12:00pm Tan. Schedule back-waxing in time for Saturday party where you know you will end up shirtless.
12:30 p.m. Pay trainer for anabolic steroids and schedule a workout. Shower, taking ten minutes to knot your tie while you check-out your best friend's boyfriend undress with the calculation of someone used to wearing a t-back and having dollars stuffed in their crotch.
1:00 p.m. Meet someone for whom you only know his waist, chest and penis size from AOL M4M chat for lunch at a hot, new restaurant. Because the maître d' recognizes you from a gay bar, you are whisked past the Christian heterosexual couples who have been waiting patiently for a table since 12:30.
2:30 p.m. "Dessert at your place." Find out, once again, people lie on AOL.
3:33 p.m. Assume complete control of the U.S., state, and local governments (in addition to other nations' governments); destroy all healthy Christian marriages; recruit all children grades Kindergarten through 12 into your amoral, filthy lifestyle; secure complete control of the media, starting with sitcoms; molest innocent children; give AIDS to as many people as you can; host a pornographic "art" exhibit at your local art museum; and turn people away from Jesus, causing them to burn forever in Hell.
4:10 p.m. Time permitting, bring about the general decline of Western Civilization and look like you are having way too much fun doing it.
4:30 p.m. Take a disco-nap to prevent facial wrinkles from the stress of world conquest and being so terribly witty.
6:00 p.m. Open a fabulous new bottle of Malbec.
6:47 P.M. Bake Ketamine for weekend. Test recipe.
7:00 P.M. Go to Abercrombie & Fitch and announce in a loud voice, "Over!"
7:40 P.M. Stop looking at the photographic displays at Abercrombie & Fitch and go to a cool store to begin shopping.
8:30 p.m. Light dinner with catty homosexual friends at a restaurant you will be "over" by the time it gets its first review in the local paper.
10:30 p.m. Cocktails at a debauched gay bar, trying to avoid alcoholic queens who can't navigate a crowd with a lit cigarette in one hand and a Stoli in a cheap plastic cup in the other. Make audible remark about how "trashy" people who still think smoking is acceptable are.
12:00 a.m. "Nightcap at your place." Find out that people lie in bars, too.
THE HOMOSEXUAL AGENDA!
As every Christian knows, there is only one enemy that threatens our entire civilization. And I am, of course, not talking about Satan. I'm talking about those damned homosexuals! Yes, they give otherwise dull hair radiant highlights and our imperfect décor those fabulous flourishes that elude our more predictable heterosexual sensibilities, but at what price? In exchange for a little panache, we allow homosexuals to steal our children and destroy our Christian marriages. And how do they do this? With their secret masterplan -- The Homosexual Agenda!
Many a well-intentioned person has asked me, "Betty, what exactly is The Homosexual Agenda?" Well, if you have to ask, you are probably already under its pernicious influence and blithely hop-scotching your way straight to Hell. Nevertheless, the details of The Homosexual Agenda have -- up until this day -- been kept more secret than the nature of John Travolta's and Tom Cruise's marriages. But I am pleased to announce that through innumerable free vodka sea-breezes and some artful Christian skullduggery, I have gotten my hands on an authentic copy of The Homosexual Agenda. Praise the Lord!
I have had my secretaries, Miss Anne Thrope and Anita Priceczech, transcribe The Homosexual Agenda from the back of a used cocktail napkin (the original is to be placed in the Smithsonian Institute) for your convenient reference. Never again shall we be surprised by what these malevolent Nancy Boys are up to. While they may still be able to surprise us with a cunningly perfect piece of Chinese porcelain for our Biederimeier end-table, they will never again be able to surreptitiously take over our culture, families and prime-time television without God-fearing Christians being one step ahead of them! Praise the Lord!
The Homosexual Agenda
8:00 a.m. Wake up. Wonder where you are.
8:01 a.m. Realize you are lying on 100 percent cotton sheets of at least a 300 count, so don't panic; you're not slumming.
8:02 a.m. Realize you are actually in your own bed for a change. Wake stranger next to you and tell them you are late for work so won't be able to cook breakfast for them. Mutter "sorry" as you help him look for his far-flung underwear. You find out that you tore his boxers while ripping them off him last night, so you "loan" him a pair of boxer-briefs, but not the new ones because you never intend to see him again.
8:05 a.m. Tell the stranger, whose name eludes you, "It was fun. I'll give you a call," as you usher him out the door, avoiding his egregious morning-breath.
8:06 a.m. Crumple and dispose of the piece of paper with his telephone number on it when you get to the kitchen.
8:07 a.m. Make a high protein breakfast while watching the Today show. Wonder if the stories you've heard about Matt Lauer are true. Decide they must be.
8:30 a.m. Italian or domestic? Decide to go with three-button Italian and the only shirt that is clean.
8:45 a.m. Climb into red Z4 and try not to look too much like Barbie driving one of her accessories as you pull out of your underground parking. Revos or Armanis? Go with Revos.
9:35 a.m. Stroll into office.
9:36 a.m. Close door to office and call best friend and laugh about the guy who spent the night at your condo. Point out something annoying about best friend's boyfriend but quickly add "It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks, just as long as you love him."
10:15 a.m. Leave office, telling your secretary you are "meeting with a client." Pretend not to notice her insubordinate roll of her eyes (or the cloying "poem" she has tacked to her cubicle wall).
10:30 a.m. Hair appointment for lowlights and cut. Purchase of Aveda anti-humectant pomade.
11:30 a.m. Run into personal trainer at gym. Pester him about getting you Human Growth Hormone. Spend 30 minutes talking to friends on your cell phone while using Hammer Strength machines, preparing a mental-matrix of which circuit parties everyone is going to and which are now passe.
12:00pm Tan. Schedule back-waxing in time for Saturday party where you know you will end up shirtless.
12:30 p.m. Pay trainer for anabolic steroids and schedule a workout. Shower, taking ten minutes to knot your tie while you check-out your best friend's boyfriend undress with the calculation of someone used to wearing a t-back and having dollars stuffed in their crotch.
1:00 p.m. Meet someone for whom you only know his waist, chest and penis size from AOL M4M chat for lunch at a hot, new restaurant. Because the maître d' recognizes you from a gay bar, you are whisked past the Christian heterosexual couples who have been waiting patiently for a table since 12:30.
2:30 p.m. "Dessert at your place." Find out, once again, people lie on AOL.
3:33 p.m. Assume complete control of the U.S., state, and local governments (in addition to other nations' governments); destroy all healthy Christian marriages; recruit all children grades Kindergarten through 12 into your amoral, filthy lifestyle; secure complete control of the media, starting with sitcoms; molest innocent children; give AIDS to as many people as you can; host a pornographic "art" exhibit at your local art museum; and turn people away from Jesus, causing them to burn forever in Hell.
4:10 p.m. Time permitting, bring about the general decline of Western Civilization and look like you are having way too much fun doing it.
4:30 p.m. Take a disco-nap to prevent facial wrinkles from the stress of world conquest and being so terribly witty.
6:00 p.m. Open a fabulous new bottle of Malbec.
6:47 P.M. Bake Ketamine for weekend. Test recipe.
7:00 P.M. Go to Abercrombie & Fitch and announce in a loud voice, "Over!"
7:40 P.M. Stop looking at the photographic displays at Abercrombie & Fitch and go to a cool store to begin shopping.
8:30 p.m. Light dinner with catty homosexual friends at a restaurant you will be "over" by the time it gets its first review in the local paper.
10:30 p.m. Cocktails at a debauched gay bar, trying to avoid alcoholic queens who can't navigate a crowd with a lit cigarette in one hand and a Stoli in a cheap plastic cup in the other. Make audible remark about how "trashy" people who still think smoking is acceptable are.
12:00 a.m. "Nightcap at your place." Find out that people lie in bars, too.
November 25, 2008
Update
hey peeps.
Just a quick update while I have a few minutes.
Life is good! Im traveling, Im dog sitting, Im happy! I wish I could have someone to cuddle with besides the German Shepard Im taking care of BUT he is a good cuddler.
Im looking forward to my 4 day weekend!!! OMG am I looking forward to it. Im going to Lake Havsu for my friends wedding, and Ive never been there so Im excited. Im hoping to get down to San Diego again soon, and Im looking into schools so I can get a degree hopefully before Im 30... and this means Ill probably have to move away to go to school...which is sad, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Im gonna probably bury myself in financial aid and student loans but damnit, Im gonna do it, and Im gonna make it. Damnit.
Thank you all so much for continuing to read my blog and click those ads!! I should be getting my first payment from google in January and Im excited. And I have you all to thank. Keep it up! Im sorry that my blog has been lack luster laterly, Ive been very busy, and life always seems to get in the way but the things getting in my way have been so good that I can;t say I wish it were different!
Someone once told me that 2007 was their year to shine, his year to come out and be the center of attention and he had everything he wanted... knowing full well that 2007 was one of the worst years of my life.... now he isnt happy, and Im on top of the world...and I feel bad for him. I dont want to rub it in his face or gloat...I just feel bad for him....but I guess thats life ya know? sometimes youre up, sometimes your down. I guess Im on the up and I've decided that Im going to find everyway possible to continue heading upward and onward.
peace out bitches, I love your faces.
Andru
Just a quick update while I have a few minutes.
Life is good! Im traveling, Im dog sitting, Im happy! I wish I could have someone to cuddle with besides the German Shepard Im taking care of BUT he is a good cuddler.
Im looking forward to my 4 day weekend!!! OMG am I looking forward to it. Im going to Lake Havsu for my friends wedding, and Ive never been there so Im excited. Im hoping to get down to San Diego again soon, and Im looking into schools so I can get a degree hopefully before Im 30... and this means Ill probably have to move away to go to school...which is sad, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Im gonna probably bury myself in financial aid and student loans but damnit, Im gonna do it, and Im gonna make it. Damnit.
Thank you all so much for continuing to read my blog and click those ads!! I should be getting my first payment from google in January and Im excited. And I have you all to thank. Keep it up! Im sorry that my blog has been lack luster laterly, Ive been very busy, and life always seems to get in the way but the things getting in my way have been so good that I can;t say I wish it were different!
Someone once told me that 2007 was their year to shine, his year to come out and be the center of attention and he had everything he wanted... knowing full well that 2007 was one of the worst years of my life.... now he isnt happy, and Im on top of the world...and I feel bad for him. I dont want to rub it in his face or gloat...I just feel bad for him....but I guess thats life ya know? sometimes youre up, sometimes your down. I guess Im on the up and I've decided that Im going to find everyway possible to continue heading upward and onward.
peace out bitches, I love your faces.
Andru
November 21, 2008
Actual Work Conversation
Serg: "Andru, I'm running ahead of schedule..."
Andru: "...ok. Did you want a cookie or something?"
Serg: "hahaha no man Im cool...so for the next call...can I come early?"
Andru: "Serg, if your wife has been okay with it for this long, I'm sure the customer will be fine with it."
Serg: "hahaha well you dont know what youre talking about, Im the latin stallion."
Andru: "Yet you have no kids....ya know they used to shoot stallions who couldn't be bred."
Serg: "Trust me, I do the 'shooting'"
Andru: "......ew."
This has been another, Actual Work Conversation
Andru: "...ok. Did you want a cookie or something?"
Serg: "hahaha no man Im cool...so for the next call...can I come early?"
Andru: "Serg, if your wife has been okay with it for this long, I'm sure the customer will be fine with it."
Serg: "hahaha well you dont know what youre talking about, Im the latin stallion."
Andru: "Yet you have no kids....ya know they used to shoot stallions who couldn't be bred."
Serg: "Trust me, I do the 'shooting'"
Andru: "......ew."
This has been another, Actual Work Conversation
Viva La Musica
This is what I am listening to currently. I highly recommend you download and give them a listen. If you don't like them, its cool, just thought I would share cuz Im at work and SO BORED! ok here we go:
Jazmine Sullivan "Bust Your Windows"
Des'ree "You Gotta Be"
Lenny Kravitz "American Woman"
David Archuleta "My Hands"
Pizzicato Five "Sugar Baby Love"
Kelly Clarkson "Sober"
Beyonce "Put a Ring on it"
Natalie Imbruglia "Wishing I Was There"
Natasha Beddingfield "Unwritten"
Lillix "What I Like About You"
Lumidee & Tony Sunshine "She's Like The Wind"
Van Halen "You Really Got Me"
Enjoy!
Jazmine Sullivan "Bust Your Windows"
Des'ree "You Gotta Be"
Lenny Kravitz "American Woman"
David Archuleta "My Hands"
Pizzicato Five "Sugar Baby Love"
Kelly Clarkson "Sober"
Beyonce "Put a Ring on it"
Natalie Imbruglia "Wishing I Was There"
Natasha Beddingfield "Unwritten"
Lillix "What I Like About You"
Lumidee & Tony Sunshine "She's Like The Wind"
Van Halen "You Really Got Me"
Enjoy!
November 20, 2008
November 19, 2008
November 17, 2008
Weird things
okay, so I have these moments when I look around and start to notice weird shit. Like the fact that we drive on Parkways and park on Driveways...but that's not really all that fun or interesting... however, I have noticed a lot of weird things about myself... and here is a list:
1. I have become quite the Chunky Peanut Butter lover! I woke up at 2:30 this morning CRAVING chunky peanut butter, so I went into the kitchen, grabbed a spoon, grabbed the PB and dug a lil spoonful out, put the jar back, and sat on my balcony, enjoying the cool night air, and my little spoonful of peanut butter. Went back inside, had a glass of milk and then went back to bed.
2. I am quite the Milk drinker. I mean, I've been a milk drinker since I was a kid...that's how it was in my family, kids had milk with breakfast and dinner. Unless we wanted Juice. It was like an unspoken rule, adults had wine, or beer, or soda with dinner, kids had water or milk. As an adult, I Love Milk. I drink it....cuz I enjoy it. I am the guy who buys the two gallons for $4.50 every week or so. I use it for everything, cereal, cooking, baking, drinking...everything. What's weirder is that I have become such a creature of habit, that there are some foods I won't eat unless I have milk to accompany it. The following foods do not appeal to me unless I have milk:
Any baked good or pastry
breakfast food of any kind
Pasta's with cream sauces
Anything with Pesto Sauce
Mac & Cheese
PB & J
...well anything with peanut butter really...
Pot Pies
Meatloaf
Tuna Noodle Casserole
Pasta w/ butter & cheese
Little Caesars $5 Pizza (sometimes, I wont, but usually I do)
3. I hate cutting my nails. I don't want them long and gross...I just don't want them to grow. Because I hate taking the time to sit down and cut my finger and toe nails.
4. I have weird outer toes. The little baby toes...mine are weird looking. They kinda freak me out.
5. Roller Derby has changed my way of thinking. For example...my friends have told me time and time again that I drive like a hellion. My ex called me "Captain Crazy" on the freeway. One friend has said more than once "Andy tried to kill me!!!" Which is lame because SHE is the one who needed to be at LAX by 3 and wasn't ready to go until 1:30. I was just trying to get her there on time. Anyway, thanks to Derby, I see this differently, Im not an asshole driver, I'm a Jammer :-) I'm just trying to get past the Blockers and the Pivots. On the Road of life, there are Blockers, and there are Jammers. I am a Jammer behind the wheel.
6. I make fun of emo kids alot. It's not because they look a certain way or anything like that....its the emo "whoa is me" bullshit that is so unnecessary. If you're so unhappy, do something to change it, or shut up. But they are fun to make fun of... which is sad, but true. HOWEVER... sometimes, some of those emo boys...are REALLY hot.
7. Goth people, the full on pale makeup, black everything else, Marilyn Manson-esque just...full on "I shit Bats" Goth kids...freak me out when they smile and laugh. It just seems so...unnatural. LMAO. But I like Goth kids, they are usually very creative and artistic...all be it, a big downer to be around sometimes, BUT I respect them.
8. Whenever someone asks "Who are you?" I almost instinctively respond "who do you want me to be?"
9. I love that when I go to Outlaws, there may be a few hetero douchebags who don't like the gay guy in the bar... but you see, the two hottie bartender girls...are my friends, (shout out to my girls Jessy and Kelly) and the two big burly scary bouncers at the door, smile and hug me when I arrive. BOOM.
10. Blasphemy make me laugh. I try to be respectful of religions and people's religious beliefs (except the Mormons, fuck those civil rights stealing douche-jockeys) but honestly, I can't help it, blasphemy is hysterical.
1. I have become quite the Chunky Peanut Butter lover! I woke up at 2:30 this morning CRAVING chunky peanut butter, so I went into the kitchen, grabbed a spoon, grabbed the PB and dug a lil spoonful out, put the jar back, and sat on my balcony, enjoying the cool night air, and my little spoonful of peanut butter. Went back inside, had a glass of milk and then went back to bed.
2. I am quite the Milk drinker. I mean, I've been a milk drinker since I was a kid...that's how it was in my family, kids had milk with breakfast and dinner. Unless we wanted Juice. It was like an unspoken rule, adults had wine, or beer, or soda with dinner, kids had water or milk. As an adult, I Love Milk. I drink it....cuz I enjoy it. I am the guy who buys the two gallons for $4.50 every week or so. I use it for everything, cereal, cooking, baking, drinking...everything. What's weirder is that I have become such a creature of habit, that there are some foods I won't eat unless I have milk to accompany it. The following foods do not appeal to me unless I have milk:
Any baked good or pastry
breakfast food of any kind
Pasta's with cream sauces
Anything with Pesto Sauce
Mac & Cheese
PB & J
...well anything with peanut butter really...
Pot Pies
Meatloaf
Tuna Noodle Casserole
Pasta w/ butter & cheese
Little Caesars $5 Pizza (sometimes, I wont, but usually I do)
3. I hate cutting my nails. I don't want them long and gross...I just don't want them to grow. Because I hate taking the time to sit down and cut my finger and toe nails.
4. I have weird outer toes. The little baby toes...mine are weird looking. They kinda freak me out.
5. Roller Derby has changed my way of thinking. For example...my friends have told me time and time again that I drive like a hellion. My ex called me "Captain Crazy" on the freeway. One friend has said more than once "Andy tried to kill me!!!" Which is lame because SHE is the one who needed to be at LAX by 3 and wasn't ready to go until 1:30. I was just trying to get her there on time. Anyway, thanks to Derby, I see this differently, Im not an asshole driver, I'm a Jammer :-) I'm just trying to get past the Blockers and the Pivots. On the Road of life, there are Blockers, and there are Jammers. I am a Jammer behind the wheel.
6. I make fun of emo kids alot. It's not because they look a certain way or anything like that....its the emo "whoa is me" bullshit that is so unnecessary. If you're so unhappy, do something to change it, or shut up. But they are fun to make fun of... which is sad, but true. HOWEVER... sometimes, some of those emo boys...are REALLY hot.
7. Goth people, the full on pale makeup, black everything else, Marilyn Manson-esque just...full on "I shit Bats" Goth kids...freak me out when they smile and laugh. It just seems so...unnatural. LMAO. But I like Goth kids, they are usually very creative and artistic...all be it, a big downer to be around sometimes, BUT I respect them.
8. Whenever someone asks "Who are you?" I almost instinctively respond "who do you want me to be?"
9. I love that when I go to Outlaws, there may be a few hetero douchebags who don't like the gay guy in the bar... but you see, the two hottie bartender girls...are my friends, (shout out to my girls Jessy and Kelly) and the two big burly scary bouncers at the door, smile and hug me when I arrive. BOOM.
10. Blasphemy make me laugh. I try to be respectful of religions and people's religious beliefs (except the Mormons, fuck those civil rights stealing douche-jockeys) but honestly, I can't help it, blasphemy is hysterical.
November 11, 2008
Classy Ladies
Well Hi There!! I'm Viktoria Chambers. I am 22 yrs old. I am always being mistaken for a model, which I think is like...so bitchin. I would like to meet some nice daddy types, older, wealthy, preferably next to death. Because I love to take care of them. Im a nurturer.
I dont eat much (as you can tell my picture) so Im a VERY inexpensive dinner date.
I believe in keeping it real. Be Real, Im all about the Real-ness....well, except for my boobs, tan, hair, lips, teeth, eyebrows, nose, cheekbones, chin, AGE and nails.... other than that, Im all about being real.
Hit me up if you want this kinda of flawless beauty on your liver spotted arm.
Slowing down
Well, it has been a crazy month and we're only 11 days in. The election was amazing, I never thought I would see the day that a black man would become president. I couldn't be happier. Its a sign of hope and change and acceptance in this country. Although I fear greatly for Obama, because I know there will be attempts on his life, and I hope that none of them succeed. Regardless of what his color is, and what your political views are, he is now our president and he worked very hard to get there and he deserves his chance to prove himself.
With such a great step forward, there is also a great step backwards. Prop 8 has passed. I am now a second class citizen...at least in the eyes of 52% of the voters in California. This is sickening. I am ashamed to be from California, and I am ashamed of my country and my fellow americans for allowing such discrimination to exist in this country...the land of the "free." Im sure that prop 8 is not permanent, it will be changed or removed, its just a matter of time. So don't gloat prop 8 people, cuz I'll hit you. Then rub it in your face when its overturned.
What else...oh today is my Mom's birthday! YAY. I love my mommy. she fuckin rocks.
You dont even know, she is the coolest. So Happy Birthday to Pretty.
I'm thrilled to announce that VCDD's "B" team KICKED FUCKING ASS AT THE OC GAME!!! Krazee Kate, Dr.Gyn 'o' Might, Anita Slapahoe, Lady Death, LaJefa, Hitman Heidi, Vendetta Vixen, Afternoon DD-Delight, Juv E. Nile, B-Stroyer, Clobberella (god I hope I didnt forget anyone) and everyone else were fantastic and did an amazing job! These bitches were so focused and on their game...Im so proud. VCDD BITCHES...WHAT?!?!!?!?
I can't overlook my Derby Husband/Hetero boyfriend Craig...he did a great job reffing, even though he kinda fell once, BUT it was cool cuz he jumped over two blockers who fell in front of him and landed on his skates!! I was impressed. Good job Craig.
I also met an amazing guy. We have been talking for a little while, but got to meet, and he is...well...just a genuinely good guy. He is funny, smart, driven, and I like him...ALOT. The situation is complicated for now, but hopefully in another month or two the complications will clear up and things will lighten up a bit. He knows how I feel about him so its all good.
I got sick, pretty bad, which SUCKS...I hate being sick. I usually blame someone around me, ya know, someone who was sick and gave it to me...I think I can blame Kendall cuz he was sick this weekend too but his symptoms were different from mine...so I'll just blame my shitty immune system.
I dont think that there are any other updates...OH my friend Gary...aka Gar-Bear is getting married!! Congrats to Mr and Mrs Gar-Bear. Im hoping to make it to the wedding but damnit, I got two weeks notice, and he lives in Lake Havasu City...so we will see what I can do. Im hoping I can make it, but I dont know.
OKAY well thats all I have for right now, I'll try to line up some funnies for you.
PEACE OUT!!!!! BTW CLICK THE FUCKING GOOGLE ADS!!!! Im close to reaching the goal of $100 bucks!!! yaaaaay
With such a great step forward, there is also a great step backwards. Prop 8 has passed. I am now a second class citizen...at least in the eyes of 52% of the voters in California. This is sickening. I am ashamed to be from California, and I am ashamed of my country and my fellow americans for allowing such discrimination to exist in this country...the land of the "free." Im sure that prop 8 is not permanent, it will be changed or removed, its just a matter of time. So don't gloat prop 8 people, cuz I'll hit you. Then rub it in your face when its overturned.
What else...oh today is my Mom's birthday! YAY. I love my mommy. she fuckin rocks.
You dont even know, she is the coolest. So Happy Birthday to Pretty.
I'm thrilled to announce that VCDD's "B" team KICKED FUCKING ASS AT THE OC GAME!!! Krazee Kate, Dr.Gyn 'o' Might, Anita Slapahoe, Lady Death, LaJefa, Hitman Heidi, Vendetta Vixen, Afternoon DD-Delight, Juv E. Nile, B-Stroyer, Clobberella (god I hope I didnt forget anyone) and everyone else were fantastic and did an amazing job! These bitches were so focused and on their game...Im so proud. VCDD BITCHES...WHAT?!?!!?!?
I can't overlook my Derby Husband/Hetero boyfriend Craig...he did a great job reffing, even though he kinda fell once, BUT it was cool cuz he jumped over two blockers who fell in front of him and landed on his skates!! I was impressed. Good job Craig.
I also met an amazing guy. We have been talking for a little while, but got to meet, and he is...well...just a genuinely good guy. He is funny, smart, driven, and I like him...ALOT. The situation is complicated for now, but hopefully in another month or two the complications will clear up and things will lighten up a bit. He knows how I feel about him so its all good.
I got sick, pretty bad, which SUCKS...I hate being sick. I usually blame someone around me, ya know, someone who was sick and gave it to me...I think I can blame Kendall cuz he was sick this weekend too but his symptoms were different from mine...so I'll just blame my shitty immune system.
I dont think that there are any other updates...OH my friend Gary...aka Gar-Bear is getting married!! Congrats to Mr and Mrs Gar-Bear. Im hoping to make it to the wedding but damnit, I got two weeks notice, and he lives in Lake Havasu City...so we will see what I can do. Im hoping I can make it, but I dont know.
OKAY well thats all I have for right now, I'll try to line up some funnies for you.
PEACE OUT!!!!! BTW CLICK THE FUCKING GOOGLE ADS!!!! Im close to reaching the goal of $100 bucks!!! yaaaaay
November 7, 2008
Shameless Self Promotion
Hi!! I know most of you out there reading this, and I love you for it! But I have a request... SPREAD ME AROUND!! Please. TELL EVERYONE about this blog. Myspace it, friendster it, live journal it, facebook it, whatever else there is for networking, SEND SEND SEND...here is my theory...if as many people as possible come to my blog, and enjoy it even a little, and they click that google ad, then the money will start coming in, because as you know, I get paid per click...Im at $85 right now, and once I reach 100, I start getting paid...but they only pay you the hundred bucks, after you reach it...and who couldnt use an extra hundred bucks? even if it is once every few months?
SO...please tell everyone, bulletin it http://AndrusAdventures.blogspot.com
and know that I will do the same for you should you need me to.
xoxo
Andru
SO...please tell everyone, bulletin it http://AndrusAdventures.blogspot.com
and know that I will do the same for you should you need me to.
xoxo
Andru
...and the fight started
I'll bet you thought this was gonna be political!!! HA tricked ya
Its a funny email I got and thought I would share:
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And then the fight started.
=======================================================================
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to
250 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a scale.
And then the fight started.
=====================================================================
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take
her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station...
And then the fight started... .
=====================================================================
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to
apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for
my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and
realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was
very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office..
She said, 'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too.'
And then the fight started...
===============================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and
I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone
at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear
she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started...
============================================================
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the
road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how
sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?
Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!'
So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
And then the fight started.....
Its a funny email I got and thought I would share:
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And then the fight started.
=======================================================================
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to
250 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a scale.
And then the fight started.
=====================================================================
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take
her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a gas station...
And then the fight started... .
=====================================================================
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to
apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for
my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and
realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was
very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office..
She said, 'you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too.'
And then the fight started...
===============================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and
I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone
at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear
she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started...
============================================================
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the
road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how
sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?
Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!'
So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
And then the fight started.....
November 5, 2008
MSAC is amazing
Once again, the MySpace Award Center / MikeInk.com guy is fucking amazing.
"
You screwed up
Ok so here's what I don't get.
The nastiness. The ease with which people let racist and offensive comments fall out of their mouths about Barack Obama. So many people in my opinion who look away from the negative things they may have done, too cowardly to face the mistakes they may have caused by voting for the wrong president in the past.
John McCain lost this election because he assumed American women were so shallow that if he tossed a female into the ring anyone with a vagina would vote for him. Why aren't all the loud mouthed finger pointers screaming their frustrations about John McCain's GIGANTIC misjudgment? That is why he lost. If he had chosen Mit Romney he probably would have won.
If you were a decent person you'd be disappointed in your candidate for making a really bad decision. But you can't admit that. You aren't a fair person. You can only now express your disgust for the candidate that won because your team lost, and for good reason.
Your team lost because you put George Bush into the White house......twice.
The truth is many people in this country are afraid. If you are straight and white and moderately well off financially, then you have never had to question otherwise. The ONLY thing that makes you nervous is when people who are not exactly like you want a fair shake.
What might that mean to your lifestyle?
There are people who are different. There are different beliefs and cultures. Not everyone is Christian.
Ask yourself this honestly. Are you respectful of people who are different or do you insist that they follow your rules and social behavior? How do you feel about people who are not Christian? Do you feel you have the right to insisted they live by your beliefs? Are you truly a kind and compassionate person or do you pretend to be, saying please and thank you because it's what good people do?
After the past eight disastrous years how can anyone who participated in creating this mess honestly have the nerve to tell anyone who they should vote for?
John McCain didn't just lose, he was SLAUGHTERED. Because Americans are sick of the same old bullshit. Point your angry little accusatory fingers at yourselves because YOU created this mess. If a Democrat in office makes you angry, have the courage to admit that is was because you made the horrible mistake that swayed Americans in the other direction."
"
You screwed up
Ok so here's what I don't get.
The nastiness. The ease with which people let racist and offensive comments fall out of their mouths about Barack Obama. So many people in my opinion who look away from the negative things they may have done, too cowardly to face the mistakes they may have caused by voting for the wrong president in the past.
John McCain lost this election because he assumed American women were so shallow that if he tossed a female into the ring anyone with a vagina would vote for him. Why aren't all the loud mouthed finger pointers screaming their frustrations about John McCain's GIGANTIC misjudgment? That is why he lost. If he had chosen Mit Romney he probably would have won.
If you were a decent person you'd be disappointed in your candidate for making a really bad decision. But you can't admit that. You aren't a fair person. You can only now express your disgust for the candidate that won because your team lost, and for good reason.
Your team lost because you put George Bush into the White house......twice.
The truth is many people in this country are afraid. If you are straight and white and moderately well off financially, then you have never had to question otherwise. The ONLY thing that makes you nervous is when people who are not exactly like you want a fair shake.
What might that mean to your lifestyle?
There are people who are different. There are different beliefs and cultures. Not everyone is Christian.
Ask yourself this honestly. Are you respectful of people who are different or do you insist that they follow your rules and social behavior? How do you feel about people who are not Christian? Do you feel you have the right to insisted they live by your beliefs? Are you truly a kind and compassionate person or do you pretend to be, saying please and thank you because it's what good people do?
After the past eight disastrous years how can anyone who participated in creating this mess honestly have the nerve to tell anyone who they should vote for?
John McCain didn't just lose, he was SLAUGHTERED. Because Americans are sick of the same old bullshit. Point your angry little accusatory fingers at yourselves because YOU created this mess. If a Democrat in office makes you angry, have the courage to admit that is was because you made the horrible mistake that swayed Americans in the other direction."
LOOP HOLE....PAYBACK IS A BITCH!!!!!!
http://www. mormonsstoleourrights. com/#petition
read very carefully. SIGN THE PETITION.
Its time turn the tables and teach them a lesson!
read very carefully. SIGN THE PETITION.
Its time turn the tables and teach them a lesson!
Ashamed.
Before I post the Wise words of my friend Tacy, I have to get this out:
I am disgusted by California. I am disgusted by Mormons. I am disgusted by the out of state organizations being allowed to fund a proposition that isn't involving their state.
Even though it is not technically over, I'm pretty sure California has voted, and me, my friends, my amazing friends who I love...will be second class citizens. I'm repulsed by the air I breathe because it's Californian air. I've never been so ashamed of my state and my country before. From now on, if the subject should ever come up, I'm Canadian. Fuck this place.
I think the gays should now start rioting. shut shit down. go on strike...SOMETHING. This Ghandi style peaceful protest bullshit doesn't work anymore. The Blacks fought back, it worked. The Drag Queens fought back at Stonewall...and our Civil rights movement began...I THINK ITS TIME WE PUT ON OUR BRASS KNUCKLES AND GETS TO SWINGIN, and I'm more than happy and very ready to on the front lines.
WARNING: The following statement does not pertain to those of you who voted "no" on 8...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA!!! FUCK YOU CHURCH OF LATTER DAY SAINTS!!! FUCK YOU FAKE CHRISTIANS WHO PICK AND CHOOSE YOUR SCRIPTURES TO FOLLOW!!!! FUCK YOU ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY ARE GOOD ENOUGH TO SAY WHAT GOD HATES!!! FUCK YOU FOCUS ON THE FAMILY!!! FUCK YOU ALL WHO VOTED YES ON 8!!!! I HOPE YOU ALL DIE HORRIBLE PAINFUL AGONIZING SLOW TORTUROUS DEATHS!!!!!
Any REAL Christian will tell you that no one, NO ONE is good enough for God. and NO ONE EVER WILL BE...that's why he sacrificed his son...for every sin that will ever be committed. God doesn't HATE. He loves, unconditionally. We all sin, and people still love us unconditionally... its no different. Im so sick of these hypocrite religious sheep who don't dig any deeper than what their inbred relatives tell them. I have a friend named Melissa, who is probably the most religious friend I have ever had, and she loves me. She once told me that God and Jesus know who I am, and whatever I do in my life is between me, and them. The rest of the people who judge and throw stones...dont matter. What matters is Me...and God. Melissa is fuckin RAD.
If anyone gloats to me about Prop 8 passing..I will hurt you. I will attack you with every ounce of strength in my body. I will GIVE YOU A FUCKING REASON TO HATE AND DISCRIMINATE AGAINST ME MOTHER FUCKERS
My level headed and extremely intelligent friend Tacy said this to me:
"Listen Andru, the problem is this... We as a nation need to fix the influx of religion in our government FIRST; and one way to fix it would be to stop having state issued marriage licenses. Marriage belongs in the church, or with you, your spouse, and your spirituality. The state merely acknowledges a civil contract to accept responsibility for each other's taxes, debt, property, children, and health.
What you should be fighting for is Civil Unions in state government, for everyone. Then you eliminate any Christian's argument against allowing all people to have Civil Unions. In fact, we should be able to civilly unionize with 10 other individuals if we want. When you take religion out of government, it is able to be more fair, impartial, and rational.
Tell your friends."
She makes a damn good point. Its not about the word "Marriage" its not about GOD, its about civil rights and liberties.
Consider me a Dixie Chick...Im ashamed of my home state.
I am; however, very happy that Obama won. It gives me home that change can happen in this fucked up country.
Plus, people keep telling me "Its not over...absentee ballots are still being counted, its too close to call...dont give up" I dont know if I can hope anymore. Im kinda tapped out.
So..anyone know anybody in Massachusetts? Cuz everyone is equal there, maybe I could rent a room from someone? cuz moving there is starting to look really good...or Canada.
I am disgusted by California. I am disgusted by Mormons. I am disgusted by the out of state organizations being allowed to fund a proposition that isn't involving their state.
Even though it is not technically over, I'm pretty sure California has voted, and me, my friends, my amazing friends who I love...will be second class citizens. I'm repulsed by the air I breathe because it's Californian air. I've never been so ashamed of my state and my country before. From now on, if the subject should ever come up, I'm Canadian. Fuck this place.
I think the gays should now start rioting. shut shit down. go on strike...SOMETHING. This Ghandi style peaceful protest bullshit doesn't work anymore. The Blacks fought back, it worked. The Drag Queens fought back at Stonewall...and our Civil rights movement began...I THINK ITS TIME WE PUT ON OUR BRASS KNUCKLES AND GETS TO SWINGIN, and I'm more than happy and very ready to on the front lines.
WARNING: The following statement does not pertain to those of you who voted "no" on 8...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA!!! FUCK YOU CHURCH OF LATTER DAY SAINTS!!! FUCK YOU FAKE CHRISTIANS WHO PICK AND CHOOSE YOUR SCRIPTURES TO FOLLOW!!!! FUCK YOU ANYONE WHO THINKS THEY ARE GOOD ENOUGH TO SAY WHAT GOD HATES!!! FUCK YOU FOCUS ON THE FAMILY!!! FUCK YOU ALL WHO VOTED YES ON 8!!!! I HOPE YOU ALL DIE HORRIBLE PAINFUL AGONIZING SLOW TORTUROUS DEATHS!!!!!
Any REAL Christian will tell you that no one, NO ONE is good enough for God. and NO ONE EVER WILL BE...that's why he sacrificed his son...for every sin that will ever be committed. God doesn't HATE. He loves, unconditionally. We all sin, and people still love us unconditionally... its no different. Im so sick of these hypocrite religious sheep who don't dig any deeper than what their inbred relatives tell them. I have a friend named Melissa, who is probably the most religious friend I have ever had, and she loves me. She once told me that God and Jesus know who I am, and whatever I do in my life is between me, and them. The rest of the people who judge and throw stones...dont matter. What matters is Me...and God. Melissa is fuckin RAD.
If anyone gloats to me about Prop 8 passing..I will hurt you. I will attack you with every ounce of strength in my body. I will GIVE YOU A FUCKING REASON TO HATE AND DISCRIMINATE AGAINST ME MOTHER FUCKERS
My level headed and extremely intelligent friend Tacy said this to me:
"Listen Andru, the problem is this... We as a nation need to fix the influx of religion in our government FIRST; and one way to fix it would be to stop having state issued marriage licenses. Marriage belongs in the church, or with you, your spouse, and your spirituality. The state merely acknowledges a civil contract to accept responsibility for each other's taxes, debt, property, children, and health.
What you should be fighting for is Civil Unions in state government, for everyone. Then you eliminate any Christian's argument against allowing all people to have Civil Unions. In fact, we should be able to civilly unionize with 10 other individuals if we want. When you take religion out of government, it is able to be more fair, impartial, and rational.
Tell your friends."
She makes a damn good point. Its not about the word "Marriage" its not about GOD, its about civil rights and liberties.
Consider me a Dixie Chick...Im ashamed of my home state.
I am; however, very happy that Obama won. It gives me home that change can happen in this fucked up country.
Plus, people keep telling me "Its not over...absentee ballots are still being counted, its too close to call...dont give up" I dont know if I can hope anymore. Im kinda tapped out.
So..anyone know anybody in Massachusetts? Cuz everyone is equal there, maybe I could rent a room from someone? cuz moving there is starting to look really good...or Canada.
November 4, 2008
Classy Ladies
oh this one's a JEM.
I knew Miley Cyrus was a skank!
yeah, total fake ass disney skank. I understand that millions of american teens take pictures like this every single day...but you are a celebrity...a fucking DISNEY celebrity. If you aren't smart enough to realize that these pictures can get out, then maybe your achy-breaky parents should know that you are a role model for many young girls and that pictures like this might not be the best idea.... although your father is too busy riding your coat tails trying to recharge his own dead career to notice what it is you are doing....oh well.
Was Hilary Duff the only kid star that didnt turn out a tragic coke head or complete slut? I hope not. You go Miss Duff.
I knew Miley Cyrus was a skank!
yeah, total fake ass disney skank. I understand that millions of american teens take pictures like this every single day...but you are a celebrity...a fucking DISNEY celebrity. If you aren't smart enough to realize that these pictures can get out, then maybe your achy-breaky parents should know that you are a role model for many young girls and that pictures like this might not be the best idea.... although your father is too busy riding your coat tails trying to recharge his own dead career to notice what it is you are doing....oh well.
Was Hilary Duff the only kid star that didnt turn out a tragic coke head or complete slut? I hope not. You go Miss Duff.
Douche Baggery Returns!!!
I give you...the "lil Wayne" Douche
I will never understand what it is about this kind of slimy greasy douche. The jacked up teeth, the irritating confidence that is misplaced and frankly, embarrassing to witness...its all part of this tragic mess. This guy reminds me of Lil Wayne...who, for whatever reason, is considered hot. Okay, yes he works out and has the tiny waste and broad shoulders and the muscles, but here is the thing...he like 4'10" and has a big ass head...ON HIS SHOULDERS...pervs... so he looks like a buff midget with big poofy dirty lookin dreds, lame ass ugly tattoos, and fucked up bucked teeth. WHY IS THAT SEXY???? cant be his musical stylings, he sounds like a whining Jr High School student in the middle of puberty who is getting over a cold. HE IS FUCKING UGLY. But he has lots and lots of money, thus why he can get laid. What does THIS freakshow have? Besides a serious need for a bitch slap.
I just dont get it, i know everyone is different and we all have different tastes...but DAMN. I just dont understand.
DOUCHE BAGGERY I TELL YOU...DOUCHE BAGGERY...look at him!!! EW he SCREAMS Douchebag.
I will never understand what it is about this kind of slimy greasy douche. The jacked up teeth, the irritating confidence that is misplaced and frankly, embarrassing to witness...its all part of this tragic mess. This guy reminds me of Lil Wayne...who, for whatever reason, is considered hot. Okay, yes he works out and has the tiny waste and broad shoulders and the muscles, but here is the thing...he like 4'10" and has a big ass head...ON HIS SHOULDERS...pervs... so he looks like a buff midget with big poofy dirty lookin dreds, lame ass ugly tattoos, and fucked up bucked teeth. WHY IS THAT SEXY???? cant be his musical stylings, he sounds like a whining Jr High School student in the middle of puberty who is getting over a cold. HE IS FUCKING UGLY. But he has lots and lots of money, thus why he can get laid. What does THIS freakshow have? Besides a serious need for a bitch slap.
I just dont get it, i know everyone is different and we all have different tastes...but DAMN. I just dont understand.
DOUCHE BAGGERY I TELL YOU...DOUCHE BAGGERY...look at him!!! EW he SCREAMS Douchebag.
Advice...
Here are a few things I have learned over and over and over in my life, and they are true, everytime:
If it seems too good to be true, it is.
If HE seems too good to be true, He is.
Never get your hopes up over a guy/girl who SAYS she/he likes you but doesn't show it, you will always be disappointed every time.
Yes there are good men out there, look around you will find them....dating your friends, or just wanting to be your friend, or they live out of state or in my case, a whole different country! YES! I have been hit on via the internet by men in the following countries: Canada, Mexico, Chile, Venezuela, Nigeria, England, Italy, and Japan.
Why? You aren't moving here, I'm not moving there....so piss off.
Trust me, it doesn't matter how hard you try, if s/he doesn't try too, it will never happen...so don't waste your energy.
Follow your first instinct, always.
Sometimes, giving up is a very good option.
If someone at work pisses you off, deal and let it go, if they OFFEND you...speak up! If they don't apologize or they argue with you about it, offend them and walk away.
Never be anyone other than yourself, cuz you are the only person you are fooling.
Optimism is highly overrated, pessimism is at least realistic.
Chocolate will NOT cure everything, but it helps.
If you text him/her 3 or more times and they don't respond... just stop. Anymore and your a psycho stalker, and if you go off assuming they are assbags, and your wrong, you feel like an ass, look like a retard, and are considered a douchebag. If he/she doesn't respond, just stop texting cold turkey, don't try to bait them by saying "well i guess im not that important" or "I see how it is, later" cuz then you will more than likely make the situation worse. If he/she wants to, he/she will contact YOU. If not, then let them go and add them to the mounting list of disappointments. (you shouldn't have gotten your hopes up in the first place)
Relax...it will all be over soon. LOL
Yeah I'm feeling kinda shitty right now. What of it. My mood ring is a filthy brown, deal with it.
If it seems too good to be true, it is.
If HE seems too good to be true, He is.
Never get your hopes up over a guy/girl who SAYS she/he likes you but doesn't show it, you will always be disappointed every time.
Yes there are good men out there, look around you will find them....dating your friends, or just wanting to be your friend, or they live out of state or in my case, a whole different country! YES! I have been hit on via the internet by men in the following countries: Canada, Mexico, Chile, Venezuela, Nigeria, England, Italy, and Japan.
Why? You aren't moving here, I'm not moving there....so piss off.
Trust me, it doesn't matter how hard you try, if s/he doesn't try too, it will never happen...so don't waste your energy.
Follow your first instinct, always.
Sometimes, giving up is a very good option.
If someone at work pisses you off, deal and let it go, if they OFFEND you...speak up! If they don't apologize or they argue with you about it, offend them and walk away.
Never be anyone other than yourself, cuz you are the only person you are fooling.
Optimism is highly overrated, pessimism is at least realistic.
Chocolate will NOT cure everything, but it helps.
If you text him/her 3 or more times and they don't respond... just stop. Anymore and your a psycho stalker, and if you go off assuming they are assbags, and your wrong, you feel like an ass, look like a retard, and are considered a douchebag. If he/she doesn't respond, just stop texting cold turkey, don't try to bait them by saying "well i guess im not that important" or "I see how it is, later" cuz then you will more than likely make the situation worse. If he/she wants to, he/she will contact YOU. If not, then let them go and add them to the mounting list of disappointments. (you shouldn't have gotten your hopes up in the first place)
Relax...it will all be over soon. LOL
Yeah I'm feeling kinda shitty right now. What of it. My mood ring is a filthy brown, deal with it.
November 3, 2008
Pieces of Me...part 2
...so I didn't a chance to finish what I started...and I HATE that. Im back!
I have a few bones to pick...I guess its not a big deal but it bothered me... I made a comment about how stupid Yes on 8 people are...because one of them actually said "9/11 happened because God Hates Fags" Ok...if those planes had crashed into San Francisco, specifically the Castro district, then yes, MAYBE I could see why people would think that...but really? How stupid....anyway so I said "9/11 was an inside job paid for and orchestrated by the US government. Because nothing controls Americans like fear. Anyway, all of a sudden, I dont know what I'm talking about and I have been watching too many conspiracy theory movies. I don't think that's right. My opinion is what it is...and I was immediately discredited and disregarded as foolish. I realize that Im not the most mature person sometimes, and yes I joke around and yes I have a childish side, but I am almost 30 years old. Dont talk to me like I'm a child just because I am younger than you. I respected what was being said to me, but what I was saying was not respected at all, and that pissed me off. Ya know what... maybe I am a conspiracy theorist. SO WHAT. This country fucks over its own citizen with its Money system, Banking System, Interest, and Credit.... The government has its fingers in everything and controls it all, they hide info from us, they control us... so why is it SO hard to believe that the coincidences surrounding 9/11 could be MORE than just coincidence? I watched an interview of an Actual Ex Government official who said "Al Queda is not a group of terrorists. Al Queda is a computer program that the US government has been using for the past 40 yrs." But that wasn't regarded as even possible either...I didnt know what I was talking about. So I have decided that in these situations, I am going to keep my opinion to myself since it wont be taken seriously.... which brings me back to the Pieces of me... I have a serious side, I have intelligence and I have more than just cartoons in my head.
I can be political
Even though I am a goofball, I can have intelligent conversation.
I hate being talked to and treated like an irresponsible teenager, I'm an adult, maybe I'm not in my 40's but I've lived a life that alot of people wouldn't have been able to handle, I had to deal with alot of grown up situations when I was a child. I've been through more than my goofy exterior might lead you to believe and I deserve and demand respect, especially when I always try to give it. (yes I said try, because we all slip and say or do things that are disrespectful, and I always try to respect peoples thoughts and opinions)
I have a beautiful mind when Im not talking about what's in my mind. I wish I could project the images in my head onto a screen so people could see the beauty that I see.
I will strive to find the unique qualities that make something, or someone beautiful.
I don't understand why people are afraid of labels or moving too quickly. I figure get it over with. For instance: If you have first date, and you hit it off, your laughing, your holding hands, your kissing, you feel amazing....whats so scary about saying "hey this is amazing, you are amazing, lets become an item."
Why is that scary. I mean if someone went out with me, and we were totally into each other, and the next day he said " I want to be your boyfriend" I would think that that is adorable and sweet, not crazy and moving too quick. I would also say yes and then call my peeps and be like " I GOTTA BOOOOOYFRIEND I GOTTA BOOOOOOOYFRIEND"
And the Label of "boyfriend" or "girlfriend." Get over it, its a word. "Oh but I dont like the label" Get over it. Stop trying to be "deep" a label isnt a bad thing. If you went to the grocery store cuz you wanted Chili for dinner and there were no labels, you would end up crackin open a can sardines in a chili tomato sauce and wouldnt be very happy. SO PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS, its just a word. If anything it's a respectful word. It shows exclusivity and respect to the person you are dating. I know a guy who was with his guy for over 2 years but never referred to each other as boyfriends, because weren't into labels, yet they were completely exclusive, and even lived together. But not boyfriends. LAME.... I am not, nor will I ever be one of those people. I am not afraid of labels, or commitment, or relationships, or dating, or Love....and I never will be.
I dont care what anyone says or thinks, I am a Britney Spears fan. Boom.
I like the word "Idiosyncrasy" even though I rarely if ever use it.
I tend to feel like a loser for most, if not all 24 hours of the day.
Lately, I have been feeling more and more like people aren't laughing with me, as much as they are laughing at me.
Yes, I am a fast driver, and I tend to weave around cars. THIS DOES NOT MAKE ME BAD DRIVER. Get over it. Dont like it, stay the fuck outta my car!
Lately I find myself driving slower and weaving less....maybe Im getting old?
Don't bitch and complain and insult my music when in my car. If you dont like a song or artist, simply say "I don't care for this song, could we skip it?" and I will do so.
Age discrimination is stupid. I have a friend who just turned 20 and she is light-years ahead on the grown up scale than some people twice her age. I respect her opinion and thoughts more than some people 3 times her age. To Me, she isn't 20, she is Katie.
Unlike so many others, I embrace turning 30. My 20's have been such a tumultuous decade, that I am very ready to leave it behind.
The word "Tabernacle" makes me giggle without fail. Its just too funny.
When I am down in the dumps, or need to think, I hit the road. I can be found either overlooking the ocean, or in the middle of the desert staring at the stars.
There are people in my life that I turn to for advice, and there are some people in my life, who I wouldn't even talk about belly button lint with...how messed up is that?
I like dogs more than cats...mostly because I'm allergic to cat dander.
I do not want to live the rest of my life in Camarillo...but I don't know where to go.
I believe that there are real honest to goodness psychics in the world, but they are hard to find, and if you find one, DON'T LET THEM GO. If you know of one, please let me know, I need a session something fierce. I have a lot in my head that I am unsure of and a helpful pointing in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.
For those of you who actually read my blog, I wish I could get you all at one place at one time so I could hug you all. Not only does this bring me a small amount of money (Thanks to your clicking of the google ads....) but its a release for me, and its a venue for me to share with you, the things I like...or dislike.
Vomiting for me, is a fate worse than death.
There are some things about me that I need to change. My disgust for Paddy's bar for instance...I really need to just get over it. My discomfort with running into my ex...why should that bother me, it has happened a few times and it was pleasant every time. I think I am pre-programmed to want to avoid him like the plague, and even though I have every reason to...I don't hate him. I'm not in love with him anymore...(thank god)...but I don't hate him.
I try to learn something everyday, even if its learning from a mistake.
I'm addicted to WoodRanch's BBQ chopped chicken salad.
I'm a bad homo, I don't like Barbara Streisand, or Liza Minnelli, Im not a huge fan of ABBA, and I enjoy Cher more as someone to imitate when singing songs in the car than as an actual performer...although I do have a tremendous amount of respect and love for Cher for embracing the Gay community as she has.
I realize that enjoying lolcats as much as I do makes me an loloser but I don't care.
The following names are just...ugly in my mind, and I dont know why:
Bryce <----i know why this one is gross...long story)
Gunther
Amos
Thalia
Olga
Umberto
Rigaberto
Beatrix (Not Beatrice...that one is pretty)
Alma
Ty-Reeq
Blaize
Blaine
Thaddeus: other spellings Thaddious, Thadious, Thadius..etc (Tad for short)
Maricris
Pina
I don't know why, I just don't like those names, I don't even like to say them.
I think that Soap Operas provide a valuable service....Military wives and people on disability need them and I'm all for it! HOWEVER....they give there characters the STUPIDEST NAMES...
"Dakota is in love with Sierra, but Greenlee wants Dakota all for herself, even though her husband Bronson can provide a better life for Greenlee and her daughter Montana. Meanwhile, Bronson's evil mother, Chrysanthemum is trying to break them up because she wants her precious Bronson to leave Greenlee. She says that Greenlee isn't good enough for her son, and she wants him to marry her best friend, Hyacinth's youngest daughter Blueberry, even though Blueberry is only 17. But little does poor Hyacinth know that her innocent little Blueberry is pregnant, carrying the child of her secret lover, Torque, the local motorcycle mechanic, who just so happens to the illegitimate nephew of Quail Egg Valley's richest and most powerful resident... Morton Vander-Cracken. Morton runs the largest magazine publishing house in all of Quail Egg Valley. His pride and joy, is his only son... Dakota. But little does he know that he fathered a second child, a girl named Nevada, who died giving birth to her baby girl...Sierra. ***ooo the twists and turns***
WATCH WHAT HAPPENS ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF 'WALKING ON EGG SHELLS'"
Who comes up with this crap?
I think for now, this is all I can muster up. There will be more Pieces of Me posted because I am so much more than people think. And I think it's high time I let the world know. LOL
I have a few bones to pick...I guess its not a big deal but it bothered me... I made a comment about how stupid Yes on 8 people are...because one of them actually said "9/11 happened because God Hates Fags" Ok...if those planes had crashed into San Francisco, specifically the Castro district, then yes, MAYBE I could see why people would think that...but really? How stupid....anyway so I said "9/11 was an inside job paid for and orchestrated by the US government. Because nothing controls Americans like fear. Anyway, all of a sudden, I dont know what I'm talking about and I have been watching too many conspiracy theory movies. I don't think that's right. My opinion is what it is...and I was immediately discredited and disregarded as foolish. I realize that Im not the most mature person sometimes, and yes I joke around and yes I have a childish side, but I am almost 30 years old. Dont talk to me like I'm a child just because I am younger than you. I respected what was being said to me, but what I was saying was not respected at all, and that pissed me off. Ya know what... maybe I am a conspiracy theorist. SO WHAT. This country fucks over its own citizen with its Money system, Banking System, Interest, and Credit.... The government has its fingers in everything and controls it all, they hide info from us, they control us... so why is it SO hard to believe that the coincidences surrounding 9/11 could be MORE than just coincidence? I watched an interview of an Actual Ex Government official who said "Al Queda is not a group of terrorists. Al Queda is a computer program that the US government has been using for the past 40 yrs." But that wasn't regarded as even possible either...I didnt know what I was talking about. So I have decided that in these situations, I am going to keep my opinion to myself since it wont be taken seriously.... which brings me back to the Pieces of me... I have a serious side, I have intelligence and I have more than just cartoons in my head.
I can be political
Even though I am a goofball, I can have intelligent conversation.
I hate being talked to and treated like an irresponsible teenager, I'm an adult, maybe I'm not in my 40's but I've lived a life that alot of people wouldn't have been able to handle, I had to deal with alot of grown up situations when I was a child. I've been through more than my goofy exterior might lead you to believe and I deserve and demand respect, especially when I always try to give it. (yes I said try, because we all slip and say or do things that are disrespectful, and I always try to respect peoples thoughts and opinions)
I have a beautiful mind when Im not talking about what's in my mind. I wish I could project the images in my head onto a screen so people could see the beauty that I see.
I will strive to find the unique qualities that make something, or someone beautiful.
I don't understand why people are afraid of labels or moving too quickly. I figure get it over with. For instance: If you have first date, and you hit it off, your laughing, your holding hands, your kissing, you feel amazing....whats so scary about saying "hey this is amazing, you are amazing, lets become an item."
Why is that scary. I mean if someone went out with me, and we were totally into each other, and the next day he said " I want to be your boyfriend" I would think that that is adorable and sweet, not crazy and moving too quick. I would also say yes and then call my peeps and be like " I GOTTA BOOOOOYFRIEND I GOTTA BOOOOOOOYFRIEND"
And the Label of "boyfriend" or "girlfriend." Get over it, its a word. "Oh but I dont like the label" Get over it. Stop trying to be "deep" a label isnt a bad thing. If you went to the grocery store cuz you wanted Chili for dinner and there were no labels, you would end up crackin open a can sardines in a chili tomato sauce and wouldnt be very happy. SO PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS, its just a word. If anything it's a respectful word. It shows exclusivity and respect to the person you are dating. I know a guy who was with his guy for over 2 years but never referred to each other as boyfriends, because weren't into labels, yet they were completely exclusive, and even lived together. But not boyfriends. LAME.... I am not, nor will I ever be one of those people. I am not afraid of labels, or commitment, or relationships, or dating, or Love....and I never will be.
I dont care what anyone says or thinks, I am a Britney Spears fan. Boom.
I like the word "Idiosyncrasy" even though I rarely if ever use it.
I tend to feel like a loser for most, if not all 24 hours of the day.
Lately, I have been feeling more and more like people aren't laughing with me, as much as they are laughing at me.
Yes, I am a fast driver, and I tend to weave around cars. THIS DOES NOT MAKE ME BAD DRIVER. Get over it. Dont like it, stay the fuck outta my car!
Lately I find myself driving slower and weaving less....maybe Im getting old?
Don't bitch and complain and insult my music when in my car. If you dont like a song or artist, simply say "I don't care for this song, could we skip it?" and I will do so.
Age discrimination is stupid. I have a friend who just turned 20 and she is light-years ahead on the grown up scale than some people twice her age. I respect her opinion and thoughts more than some people 3 times her age. To Me, she isn't 20, she is Katie.
Unlike so many others, I embrace turning 30. My 20's have been such a tumultuous decade, that I am very ready to leave it behind.
The word "Tabernacle" makes me giggle without fail. Its just too funny.
When I am down in the dumps, or need to think, I hit the road. I can be found either overlooking the ocean, or in the middle of the desert staring at the stars.
There are people in my life that I turn to for advice, and there are some people in my life, who I wouldn't even talk about belly button lint with...how messed up is that?
I like dogs more than cats...mostly because I'm allergic to cat dander.
I do not want to live the rest of my life in Camarillo...but I don't know where to go.
I believe that there are real honest to goodness psychics in the world, but they are hard to find, and if you find one, DON'T LET THEM GO. If you know of one, please let me know, I need a session something fierce. I have a lot in my head that I am unsure of and a helpful pointing in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.
For those of you who actually read my blog, I wish I could get you all at one place at one time so I could hug you all. Not only does this bring me a small amount of money (Thanks to your clicking of the google ads....) but its a release for me, and its a venue for me to share with you, the things I like...or dislike.
Vomiting for me, is a fate worse than death.
There are some things about me that I need to change. My disgust for Paddy's bar for instance...I really need to just get over it. My discomfort with running into my ex...why should that bother me, it has happened a few times and it was pleasant every time. I think I am pre-programmed to want to avoid him like the plague, and even though I have every reason to...I don't hate him. I'm not in love with him anymore...(thank god)...but I don't hate him.
I try to learn something everyday, even if its learning from a mistake.
I'm addicted to WoodRanch's BBQ chopped chicken salad.
I'm a bad homo, I don't like Barbara Streisand, or Liza Minnelli, Im not a huge fan of ABBA, and I enjoy Cher more as someone to imitate when singing songs in the car than as an actual performer...although I do have a tremendous amount of respect and love for Cher for embracing the Gay community as she has.
I realize that enjoying lolcats as much as I do makes me an loloser but I don't care.
The following names are just...ugly in my mind, and I dont know why:
Bryce <----i know why this one is gross...long story)
Gunther
Amos
Thalia
Olga
Umberto
Rigaberto
Beatrix (Not Beatrice...that one is pretty)
Alma
Ty-Reeq
Blaize
Blaine
Thaddeus: other spellings Thaddious, Thadious, Thadius..etc (Tad for short)
Maricris
Pina
I don't know why, I just don't like those names, I don't even like to say them.
I think that Soap Operas provide a valuable service....Military wives and people on disability need them and I'm all for it! HOWEVER....they give there characters the STUPIDEST NAMES...
"Dakota is in love with Sierra, but Greenlee wants Dakota all for herself, even though her husband Bronson can provide a better life for Greenlee and her daughter Montana. Meanwhile, Bronson's evil mother, Chrysanthemum is trying to break them up because she wants her precious Bronson to leave Greenlee. She says that Greenlee isn't good enough for her son, and she wants him to marry her best friend, Hyacinth's youngest daughter Blueberry, even though Blueberry is only 17. But little does poor Hyacinth know that her innocent little Blueberry is pregnant, carrying the child of her secret lover, Torque, the local motorcycle mechanic, who just so happens to the illegitimate nephew of Quail Egg Valley's richest and most powerful resident... Morton Vander-Cracken. Morton runs the largest magazine publishing house in all of Quail Egg Valley. His pride and joy, is his only son... Dakota. But little does he know that he fathered a second child, a girl named Nevada, who died giving birth to her baby girl...Sierra. ***ooo the twists and turns***
WATCH WHAT HAPPENS ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF 'WALKING ON EGG SHELLS'"
Who comes up with this crap?
I think for now, this is all I can muster up. There will be more Pieces of Me posted because I am so much more than people think. And I think it's high time I let the world know. LOL
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